See, that's where they'll run straight into my trap, because I'm gonna read them all first. And trust me, no one reads as fast as I do when hyped up on adrenaline, caffeine, and mortal terror. I went through every single goddamn site about werewolves in a night. Even the furry ones. Do you know how many sites there are out there about werewolf sex? Because I do, and the answer's way too freaking many.

[He shudders.] Yeah. Who even needs baths, right? A five minute shower should do the trick. Or jumping into the pond, that's a nice and public place.